Making the Most of IT

01-12-2010 Tuesday

Let me tell yáll a secret..I'm starting to enjoy this 'me' time that I have, 'me' means, just me, no Alex, no headaches. Maybe I got used to him always being with me during my day off, but now that he has other priorities, I realized it's time for me to move along, have my own priorities and enjoy things with no one but myself.

I woke up late, like around 10 am, I believe, because Damien kept on barking early in the morning and I was awakened by his loud barks. I slept when he calmed down and didn't wake again until the sun is high up in the sky. I have nothing to do again so I decided I can go back to Zabarte mall alone to buy some new DVD's.

'Me' time would also mean that I focus on what I want for myself, making myself happy with simple things, things that doesn't cost that much, like what I just mentioned; a DVD,and a nice little oreo sundae at McD's, a new eyeshadow and maybe a good game for my pc. See? I can still be happy by being cheap.

I like feeling light inside, like a feather that floats with the wind. I know that sooner or later, this feeling would go away and I try not to think about those unfortunate things that might happen when hell comes home so for now, since I only have a few days remaining to have fun alone, I have to really make the most out of it.

It doesn't take much to make me happy that's why I'm still wondering why most of the time, happiness seemed to be elusive to me. I used to ask for too much, I will admit that. I used to not be contented, I was always hungry for making more money, on maybe becoming a rich bitch someday that I have forgotten about the simple pleasures in life that are priceless. I used to be like that but I learned a lot of things.

If having a mother who has lost touch with reality is my punishment, then this is the most brutal punishment ever. I prefer something physical. I prefer physical pain. Bruises or scratches or maybe some broken bones, caused by accident could heal in time, but an emotional torture is something that will never heal. It might cease for a little while but eventually, it will come back and haunt you.

Anyway, I bought all the things I wanted at Zabarte mall. I had my hands full already so I headed home, feeling satisfied. Shopping alone is also nice, I'm a girl, I know what I want and I don't need to ask a boyfriend's approval on a certain stuff that I want to buy. I didn't even think about Alex while I was doing some serious shopping and I liked it. Moreover, I no longer feel envious when I see a couple walking hand in hand at the mall.

I enjoyed this time. It makes me think that things are gonna be okay. I'm hoping so bad that things will be okay. I'm tired of having misfortunes. I want something else. Something simple and priceless.

Labels: dvd, happiness, McDo, pink crimson, Zabarte mall

posted by Monica-Lynne @ 4:18 AM