..and this is the part that changes everything.

I woke up, sweating, feeling the awful pain in my stomach, with my head feeling light and heavy at the same time. When I checked the time in my cellphone, I groaned loudly, I've only had three hours of sleep. Not a good time to wake up. I got out of bed to take a dump real quick so I can go back to sleep. After 10 minutes in the toilet, nothing came out, I felt the pain subside somehow. I went back to the room, lie down to bed and tried to go back to sleep. Only a few seconds has passed, the pain came back. I rushed to the bathroom..nothing. Back to the room, still painful. Bathroom, one dump. Room, the pain's getting stronger.

Alarmed, I grabbed my cellphone to text Alex. I also texted my colleague and Alpon to ask about my situation, they both said the same thing--I should go to the hospital, asap. This is really a bad case of indigestion. That's all. I don't want to think of the other possibility because it's too early for that, I thought glancing at the calendar hanging on the wall. Aug 11. Yep, this is not possible.

When Alex opened the door, I was kneeling on the floor, twisting in pain. The cramp has gotten worse.

"You okay? What happened?" he asked, kneeling beside me.

"Not really.." I said through clenched teeth. I struggled to sit on the bed to show him the messages on my cellphone.

Silly conversation between two people who knew nothing about what was going on.

We packed some clothes in a small bag and off we went. He hailed a cab, we got in, and then, it began. The excruciating travel from where we were staying in Manila to the hospital in Quezon City, where my doctor is. During that moment of my struggle against the pain I'm not really familiar with, all I could was hold on to Alex and wonder how am I gonna be able to survive it. I was close to fainting. I want to cry but it feels like it wouldn't do any good. I've been warned about how painful it's gonna be, but this is definitely worse than what I imagined.

......

Getting back on track in this blogging thing is not as easy as I thought it would be. I've forgotten one simple fact about myself. While I was not able to update, or write anything down, my mind goes on a hiatus and now that I desperately want to get on with my writing, there are cobwebs inside my brain that's keeping me from producing meaningful sentences. I wonder how long would I have to wait until my mind is completely working full time again...

But I badly needed to post something here. To keep it going. To record the highlights of my life. That's why even though I've mentioned that I don't intend on posting what I've previously prepared on my old notebook, I guess I have to post them to fill this lonely blog with words. In order to keep it going, in order for the few lovely people to, hopefully, keep reading...

Uhh. I have to find my notebook first.

Believe it or not, I'm still here, still alive and kicking some good-mannered ass lately. While I was gone, I wrote some stuff on my trusty old notebook from high school, which I can't believe I still have, and I plan to copy them on my computers notepad once this thing starts working again.

So finally, my computer is resurrected. The motherboard fucked up so I have to buy a new one, thanks to my brother -from-another-mother Raymond, who helped me out in replacing the motherboard. He knows a lot about these computer hardware thingies, while I, on the other hand, is a total dummy when it comes to this. Of course, I know the basics--some softwares, installations, I can name some parts of the computer (the mouse and keyboard for example) but don't rely on me about technical specifications of the computer's hardware. Those are alien to me.

I remember when Raymond would ask me like, "Is your video card the built-in one?" and I would give him a blank stare and all I could say was, "The what is built in to why, how, when?" Then, he would just roll his eyes at me, "Never mind".

Anyway, he did help me out in choosing the right motherboard to buy. To make a long story short, I'm back to the online world of social networking sites, blogging, and other what-have-yous! Hurrah!

Now, about this blog, well, I'm terribly upset when I look at the calendar and notice how many days have passed and how many posts I've missed. I haven't moved from the last post which felt like ages ago. I've been busy, for one. Two, without my computer, I'm not in the right mood to write about anything.

Oh yeah. I did mention about the stuff that I've written right? All's well prepared. I'm only just gonna type 'em here, copy then paste on my site. Easy as that. Piece of cake. However, as I read what I've written, I realized there's no sense in posting them anymore. I have shared what I've gone through to my dearly beloved friends, some of them, I know, takes the time to be patient in reading my blogs.

They know what I'm supposed to not tell until...maybe.. I don't know when. Until maybe when my father knows about it? Yeah, as if that's gonna happen...

When I told them about it, I prepared myself for them to be surprised, like the reaction of my colleagues, but I didn't expect it to be the other way around. I was the one surprised. They kinda knew about it. Kinda, sort of, something that crosses their minds. So I asked, how'd they get the idea? 'On your blog?' Mario answered.

Dang! I rest my case. I'm not good with words. I made it all too obvious. I should've stayed mum and maybe talk about how I look, why my hair feels dry, what dress to wear, or maybe post LOTS (and I mean LOTS) of 'me' pictures in different angles and so on--that's what most girls are crazy about doing in their blogs, right? NAH. Not me, in another lifetime, maybe...